My Encounter with a Tea Master

I was invited to an outdoor tea ceremony last weekend. As you may
know, I'm a keen fan of Japanese tea ceremony - my school has a tea
ceremony club which meets every Thursday, and I make a point of never
missing it. I can't think of a more perfect way to spend a Thursday
afternoon than drinking tea and eating small sweets...

Of course, it's not all drinking tea and eating sweets. Sometimes we
have biscuits. And on one memorable occasion there was a sweet which
tasted a bit like a Fondant Fancy. We talk about it even now... (well,
I talk about it to myself, but if I could work out the Japanese for
"Do you have any more of those sweets that taste a bit like Fondant
Fancies?", I'd be talking about it with my tea ceremony teacher too).

Anyway, the tea ceremony I was invited to was part of the Miyazaki
pottery festival. I was expecting a small, garden fete type affair,
but it turns out that the pottery festival is big news in Fukui, and
there were traffic jams on every approach to the site, whilst shuttle
buses rushed back and forth from distant overflow car parks every few
minutes. Fukui-ites really like their pottery.

We found the tea ceremony tucked away in a little corner at the back
of the grounds. It turned out that there were several tents, each
being run by a different local tea master, and each one demonstrating
a different style of tea ceremony. The atmosphere was really pleasant
- it was great to sit under the trees and watch the "tea ladies" (as I
like to call them) expertly run through the intricate motions of the
ceremony almost without pause. Having tried it myself, I know how much
practice and concentration the tea ceremony takes, so I was thoroughly
impressed; whenever I try the ceremony it's reminiscent of a
chimpanzee throwing a tea bag at a kettle.

Our appointment was with a tea master called Taira-sensei, who's a
friend of my Japanese teacher. Contrary to my expectations, she seemed
pretty pleased to see a small and slightly hungover band of foreigners
turn up to her tea tent, and we were ushered into the best seats in
the house. There were four of us - Will, Emily, Luciana and myself -
and I was lucky enough to be given the "guest of honour" seat. This
basically means that I was to be given the first cup of tea, and
everyone else would have to watch me drink it before the other cups of
tea were brought out. Needless to say, the pressure was on.

After ten minutes of intricate preparation, the first cup of tea was
brought to me. "Lew, remember your training", I could hear old Obi-Wan
saying to me as the cup was brought over to me by none other than
Taira-sensei herself, but then, as I reached up to take the "cha-wan"
the voice of Yoda popped into my head with a warning: "The cave!
Remember your failure at the cave!"

Undaunted, I focused on my Jedi tea skills and remembered to take the
cup with a bow, then rotate it by two quarter-turns to the right, in
order for the cup's pattern to face outwards. I drank quickly, holding
the cup with both hands, and when I'd finished I delicately wiped the
rim of the cup with my thumb and forefinger, to remove any saliva.
After rotating the cup back the other way, I handed it back to
Taira-sensei. The first test was over. I may lack the skills of a Tea
Master, but I'm a more than capable padawan.

Now, before the tea was brought out we were treated to some
traditional Japanese sweets, in order to prepare our pallets for the
tea. They were delicious, but suddenly a problem arised: what to do
with the traditional washi (paper) that they were served on? We
presumed that one of the tea ladies would eventually emerge to relieve
us of the rubbish.

At the very end of the ceremony, it looked like our prayers were
answered - a young lady carrying a tray glided up to me and stood
waiting expectantly. After a confirming glance at Luciana, I carefully
placed my paper on the tray. The tea lady cautiously moved along the
line, and Luciana, Emily and Will followed my lead.

It was at this point that our tea lady turned to shoot a pleading and
confused look at Taira-sensei. The look seemed to ask: "What in the
hell are these stupid gaijin doing?"

Sure enough, a chuckling Taira-sensei confided to us, "The tray is for
your tickets, not for your rubbish!".

By this point, everyone was having a good old laugh, and as I turned a
bright shade of red I could hear a voice in my head saying: "The Force
is strong with you young Skywalker... but you are not a Jedi yet..."